Popping balloons!

Plastic Rafts!

Grown men in diapers!

Feet!

NOT HAVING SEX!

These are all sexual fetishes that we’ve learned about in the past year. All strange, all somewhat difficult to understand on my part, and all most likely internet-generation discoveries. No one probably new that dudes love popping balloons to get off until YouTube videos of the activity surfaced.

Now we have a new one, Sneeze Fetishists, who get off either sneezing or watching someone else sneeze. I didn’t find much information of the fetish, as their forums are fairly private (understandably as they’d surely be hounded by trolls if they went public), but what I seem to have learned (from this Gawker post), is that sneeze fetishists are not unlike the balloon poppers:

…the kink behind the sneeze fetish is quite similar to the balloon-popping fetish. It’s the sexualization of anticipation and catharsis; in this case, the anticipation is the build-up of the sneeze, and the catharsis is the sneeze itself.

Uh, okay, but what about the snot? And the faces people make when they’re sneezing? And the people whose sneezes sound like a rabbit getting hit by a train (you, gramps)? Is it hotter to watch a sexy woman sneeze or is it the type of sneeze (or amount of sneezes) that gets people off? And sneezes are like, .5 seconds long! Do you have to watch 500 sneeze in a row to reach orgasm? Or are sneeze fetishists able to finish in one sneeze’s time if the set up is sensual enough?

SO MANY QUESTIONS!

Are you a sneeze fetishist? Do you know someone who is? Can you explain it MORE TO ME?!?