Well THAT took long enough. The plug has been officially pulled on the highest rated show (by some ungodly work of number-cooking, I assume) on television, Two and a Half Men. And who do we have to thank blame, class? Nutter Butter extraordinaire Charlie Sheen, of course. After months of Vegas binges, hooking up with porn stars, hospital stays and near overdoses on cocaine, CBS has decided that maybe Mr. Sheen is a little bit of a liability. And because he is the most annoying part heart and soul of Two and Half Men, that means the show is off the air.

Of course, that’s not all. Charlie Sheen (who is currently like, riding around on a plane and hanging out with more some porn stars I think?) has been releasing drunken, belligerent statements to the press, saying he wants to fight Chuck Lorre (T&aHM’s producer in “the octagon”), as well as some other probably-not-a-good-idea rants like,

“I violently hate Chaim Levine (Chuck Lorre). He’s a stupid, stupid little man and a p**sy punk that I’d never want to be like.”

 

“All these guys told me to ‘clean it up.’  Well this is me cleaning it the f**k up.”

 

“You can tell him [Lorre] one thing. I own him.”

 

“You have the right to kill me, but you do not have the right to judge me. Boom. That’s the whole movie. That’s life.”

 

“I’m so tired of pretending my life isn’t perfect and bitching and just winning every second and I’m not perfect and bitchin’.”

 

and of course…

“I have a disease? Bullshit. I cured it with my brain.”

Charlie Sheen has never let us down in the psychopath department, so we probably shouldn’t have expected this story of sex, porn stars, and drugs to end well, but it is sad to see such a big star in the industry crash and burn as hard as he did without any realization of how screwed up he is in the noggin. Let this be a lesson to everyone, class. Don’t do drugs, especially if you’re trying to keep a $2 million per episode salary and you’re already pretty much out of your mind as it is.

RIP, Two and  Half Men, and good luck, Charlie. You’re gonna need it.