The OnlineBootyCall Million Dollar Sweepstakes is BACK and in full swing – have you started gaining tickets into the contest? WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? If you’re gonna be online, wasting time looking at cat pictures and reading the most recent news on Courtney Stodden, why not try and make some cash moneys while you do it?!

Alright alright FINE. Maybe you’re just lazy. And you haven’t really thought about all the stuff you could do with $1,000,000 freakin’ dollars. Well here, let OBC help give you some suggestions as to what you could buy yourself (after we’ve flown you out to Cali and given you to the VIP treatment).

1. A Maserati Quattroporte – $135,700

Stop puttering around in your mom’s old Miata and imagine yourself cruising the freeway in one of the top rated cars in the world. Valet park this sucka in front of the club and you’ll find yourself DROWNING in booty.

2. A three-night stay at Hôtel Fouquet’s Barrière in Paris, France – $5,550

Because you’ll want to take your new booty call on the vacation of a lifetime, get your asses on a plane (first class, le DUH) to Paris, France and get yourself a room at this unbelievably beautiful hotel on the corner of the Champs-Élysées. You’ll have enough time and cash to drink champagne, eat cheese, and get down and dirty on the patio of your elite-status hotel room. Yes please!

3. The Rolex Submariner Mens Diamond Watch – $52,879.00

Gold. Diamonds. Rolex. ‘Nuff said.

4. Mouti Iti, your private island in French Polynesia – $12,382

Yep, that’s right – your own private island is the cheapest thing on this list. Yes, it’s only two miles wide, and you’ll have to set it up from scratch, but hey. It’s your OWN DAMN ISLAND. Don’t be picky.

5. A sensible single family condo in San Diego – $549,999

So, #realtalk, its a crummy economy and maybe huge, luxury items aren’t all you want. So you’ll probably want to buy a sensible home in case you end up getting married and having kids in the future – maybe with someone on OBC? It’s happened before! Just remember… you’ll have won this money for being a fun, sexy member of #teamSINGLE, so get out there and enjoy your fortune!

Get off BCU and go get yourself some entry tickets! Your million bucks ain’t gonna win itself!