We’ve been real bad at keeping up on our weekly recap posts, and we admit – there’s no excuse. Fridays come and we’re cramming in the last few tasks we blew off all week and suddenly it’s 5 o’clock and turning off the laptop is the only thing on our minds. NOT THIS WEEK, THOUGH! As you head off in to the wild blue yonder we know as the weekend, we hope you keep these interesting, important, and just plain ol’ strange news stories in your head for icebreakers and conversation starters with potential hook ups. GET OUT YOUR 3 X 5 cards, it’s time to study!

APRIL FOOLS: The Good, The Eh, The Ugly

Good: This woman’s absolutely hiLARious prank. I don’t care what anyone says, she wins the whole holiday.

The Eh: Kid President has a message from the White House, including but not limited to farts. Love the kid, hate the government-funded “trick”.

The UGLY: They tricked us into thinking there was a Pineapple Express sequel. There was not, and now I’m sad. (Although This Is The End does look funny.)

CELEBRITY* SALAD

Robin Thicke’s new video is causin’ drama. PSST – naked ladies EVERYWHERE.

Courtney Stodden posed on the cover of Girls and Corpses magazine. She’s the reason for the asterisk – I don’t know if we can really call her a celebrity.

Emma Watson looks absolutely BANGIN on the cover of GQ magazine.

Chris Brown’s most shocking sex location is a whole lot more boring than you’d think.

Rosario Dawson’s name for her va-jay-jay, though? WAY more interesting.

Fun Videos to Share With Your Friends (Or With the Person Who Wakes Up in Your Bed on Saturday)

A sax battle on the NYC subway? YES PLEASE.

This guy can’t even steal a purse right. Talk about a FAIL.

Sexy Studies and Dating News

New research shows that male bats go down on their ladies. Take heed, human men!

Turns out abstinence-only education leads to higher STD rates. PAGING DR. OBVIOUS!

And the Most WTF Story of the Week:

An argument over a chick ends with a man literally shoving his boot up his friends butthole. You never cease to amaze us, Russia.

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Last but not least, a very sad, heartfelt RIP to Roger Ebert, movie reviewer for the Chicago Sun-Times since 1967. Your wit, humor, and insight will be missed.