I’ve always loved the Louis CK stand up routine about how angry people get on planes. About how totally ludicrous and self-absorbed it is to take offense when a place is delayed or your seat is too small or you don’t get complimentary refreshments, when in reality you should be AMAZED that you are getting shot up into the air at 500 mph and safely reaching your destination in a quarter of the time it would take to drive.

However, after seeing the video below, where a man documents his $650 first-class flight from Bangkok to Hong Kong on the brand new A380 Jumbo Jet from Emirates Airlines, I’m going to become one of those people.

I know I’m going to have a hard time cramming myself between two 300 pound men on my next Southwest flight, trying to read and choke down 12 peanuts as their elbows and farts squeeze their way into my airspace, wishing I could pee but too terrified that I might get sucked out of that tiny metal contraption they call a toilet (not that I could get there anyway, considering the fact that if either Tweedle Dee or Tweedle Dum move into the aisle the plane’s equilibrium will get thrown off and we’ll crash to Earth in a fiery blaze).

All those unfortunate factors of plane trips hadn’t bothered me all that much, UNTIL I SAW THIS RIDICULOUS BULLSH*T:

DINNER? SHOWERS? WINE? A MOTHERF***ING BAR????

I might never be able to fly again.