Ah Texas. This state, if you ask me, falls just after Florida and Arizona in the “States That Should Secede Because They Are The Worst” category. Sure, they might not have goat-rapist and might not have created a new Third Reich, but they did just try and pass a law that would allow the public to bring concealed weapons into schools and workplaces, so they come in at a solid third. Good job, Texas!

And now we get this golden video, which reminds us that there are people who are so prudish they can’t even handle a beautiful, historic statue to be displayed because IT HAS A PENIS. Just another little reminder that we as Americans need to get the metaphorical sand out of our metaphorical vaginas and realize that if we didn’t treat sex as a immoral, disgusting practice, that maybe we wouldn’t have TWO PRIMETIME TV SHOWS ABOUT TEEN PREGNANCY.