“I Need a BBW”
I have no words.
awful
5 Things That Will Ruin Your Summer
Did you know BCU is based out of San Diego, CA? It’s true. We are very fortunate to live and work in America’s Finest City, home of the Chargers, purveyor of fine Mexican food, and residence of most of the attractive people this side of the Mississippi. Here are some fun things about San Diego […]
“Twi-hards” are “Nut-jobs”
I’ve waited in line for longer than 3 hours for a movie once in my life. I was 16 years old, and I waited about 4 hours for the first midnight showing, and I was dressed as Hermione Granger. Let me go ahead and admit that now before I make fun of all the idiots […]
NOOO, DROGBA! NOOO!
Bad news, Ivory Coast fans. Didier Drogba, your inspiring captain who I most recently described as “big, strong, and fast” has… *sniff*… a broken arm, and will most likely not play in the the World Cup. According to the AP, he’s had surgery and has returned to training camp, but the team will wait until […]
Sh*t My Kids Ruined
Is your internal clock ticking? Feeling the need to procreate and enjoy the wonder of making a baby? This is a disease that is currently making a Bubonic plague-like rampage across America, a fact I’ve deduced due my Facebook friends list thumbnails being about 40% baby photos. Don’t worry, though, there are many antibiotics for […]
Crab Revenge
Did you just get cheated on? Are you sad, upset, and hurt? Are you also a raving psychotic lunatic with anger issues? Yes? Then perhaps you should head over to crabrevenge.com, an online store that sells public lice to the public with the intention of spreading them to people’s public hair. Let me break this […]
Porn Star Granny
There are things in life that cannot be unseen. War photos, the creepy music video for the Hot Chip song “I Feel Better”, and Joe Theismann’s leg break back in December of 1985 are all on my personal list. And now, by some evil twist of fate, I have another. The photo below, which, on […]
Dumb Broad Wins Stupid Reality Show
I’m sorry. That heading was supposed to say, “Vienna Girardi Wins ‘The Bachelor’,” although I still think mine is more accurate. Here are the questions that don’t matter: Did Vienna have an affair with a crew member? Did she really steal money from her Marine ex-husband? IS SHE LEADING A DOUBLE LIFE? Here are the […]
Heidi Montag’s Album Flops
Oh, Heidi. Those comparisons to Thriller didn’t quite pan out, did they? Apparently, after spending nearly $2 million on her album “Superficial,” she only sold 650 copies. We’ll put that into perspective for you. Remember William Hung? The American Idol hopeful with the god-awful rendition of “She Bangs?” His album sold 37,000 copies. Better luck next […]