I don’t know who Brandon McCarthy is, mainly because I don’t watch baseball, mainly because I’m not 100 years old. However, after hearing this story about the Oakland A’s pitcher, I may have to start paying more attention.

According to BuzzFeed, McCarthy was struck in the head by a line drive hit off Angels shortstop Erick Aybar. McCarthy walked off the field, looking fine (and fiiiiiyyyyyne, am I right, ladies?), but at the hospital learned he had “an epidural hemorrhage, brain contusion and skull fracture,” and was classified as being in “life-threatening condition.” McCarthy, though, apparently has a sense of humor ON TOP of being totally hot, talented, and rich… he spent the next couple days Tweeting about his condition, saying things like,

and,

and then finally, when he was released yesterday,

Unfortunately, despite Brandon’s condition, Brandon’s wife Amanda is NOT down, Tweeting:

So, we’re here to ask you all to Tweet this lady and convince her to let her wounded husband finally get the menage a trois he’s always dreamed of. @Mrs_McCarthy32: go forth and make it happen, guys! For Brandon!