Snooki is a Liar
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So, so many things.
A) Those boots make so much sense. She’s an Eskimo, you guys. So all that time we were making fun of her height/weight/face/life, she’s been trying to survive the winter in her igloo full of Bump-Its and P’zones.
B) What you don’t know is that she’s hiding a well worn copy of Everybody Poops behind that 1998 Machiavellian themed The 48 Laws of Power.
C) Lastly, let’s all say a prayer for that pony. He’s now infected with a rare strain of dwarf-chlamydia, and will now most likely going to spread it to all his playground friends. Run for your life, twisty snail slide! Call Haz Mat!