Each week I share a silly sex tip from Cosmopolitan magazine, with my own commentary to highlight WHY it is so ridiculous. Sometimes they just need further explanation, because at first glance they appear to be sexy and sensual tips for spicing up your sex life, but deep down they are BAD IDEAS. Like having sex in a CANOE, for example.

Other times, though, the ridiculousness is pretty self-explanatory. Like this recent tip, from Cosmo’s list of “50 ways to touch him down there.”

Although I’m sure you can tell yourself how completely BONER-KILLING it would be to start PING-PONGING a dude’s penis back and forth, I would like to submit this video, so ladies would know what they look like when “batting it back and forth.”

Case closed.