Real Men Don’t Use Porn
This sign is clearly from the 1980s, and here is how I can tell:
1)“Use”? People don’t use internet porn. Porn doesn’t walk away after you’ve fapped to it and feel dirty and taken advantage of. Porn is using you, if anything. You watch porn. Enjoy porn. Maybe you even experience porn if you’re one of the lucky few who have a 3D television set. Use porn? No way.
2) The creator of this sign was surely unaware of internet porn. Everyone finds their fetish on the internet, and I bet his is some sort of Village People themed orgy. Rule 34, right?
3) Charles Mann is almost 50 years old and is probably no longer a defensive end. The only reason Brett Favre could do it is because he sold his soul back in 1992 for a 2-decade long contract with the NFL because he knew that in 2012 the world was going to end anyway. In fact, I would not be surprised if the end of time came in B. Favre’s last season when his bones finally turn to dust and he becomes a black hole, sucking the stadium and the rest of the universe in with him.
4) Captain John Testrake is dead. RIP, heroic pilot.
5) Oh, also James Irwin is dead. RIP, astronaut-moon-walking dude.