Last week, we talked about how if people would just get on OBC (or hell, one of the hundred of dating sites on the goddang interwebscape) they wouldn’t have to resort of unsavory ways of getting laid – like HAVING SEX WITH THE SAME HORSE TWICE. In retrospect, that dude may have had a thing for horse poon, which is something that we can’t really help him with.

This week, we have another case for online dating, and one that while NOT beastiality-related, is basically as creepy and weird.

Say hello to this thumb-face, 22-year-old Frank J. Short Jr, who was arrested this week for THROWING A GLOB OF HIS JIZZ ON A STRANGER IN WAL-MART.

The 22-year-old victim allegedly says Frankie walked by her, and as he said “excuse me,” she felt what she thought was snot or spit on her leg. T’WAS NOT. T’was semen. Frank then continued to follow her around the store until she was able to run into an employees only area, where the staff called the cops and (I assume) cleaned the f***ing stranger’s cum off her leg.

Although Frank denied that he flicked his man-juice on her, he changed this story from accidentally tossing “mucus” to that he tossed some “spit” on her, claiming that he did it because he thought she was hot.

We don’t want members on OBC who force their junk-jam on people without their consent, just as we don’t want people who rape farm animals on the reg. But if you’re a single dude with a hard time getting a date, why not try OBC or another dating site before you start subjecting women to long-distance rape.

GROSS.