Sometimes you wake up in the morning, and look in the mirror and think “ugh,” and then your day just tumbles into a miserable dump from there. You stub your toe on the coffee table (who thought it was a good idea to put hardwood in a place where you have your feet ALL THE TIME ANYWAY?!!!), and you don’t have milk for your coffee, and you realize as you’re running late for work that you don’t have ANY gas, and OF COURSE there are twelve old women waiting for every pump. Usually it’s on a day like this when someone in your office comments on your outfit, and says something like “WOW, those light colored jeans don’t at ALL make your ass look like a harvest moon,” and you just want to punch them in the face so, so hard.

It’s days like this when a little pep talk from 80s star Mr. T would make your day turn from miserable to ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.