Despite their crying out that we’re all going to hell for having casual sex, it turns out most evangelical Christians have had pre-marital sex too, which seems to prove two things – it’s natural, and inevitable! According to Jezebel and Relevant Magazine,

80% of unmarried evangelical Christians aged 18-29 have had sex. The figure is just under 88% for the general population, meaning evangelicals aren’t all that much better at abstinence than anyone else.

80%? That’s like, almost all of them! That is a B – in high school which is totally passing even though your mom says you’ll never get into college with grades like that! This news  is clearly shocking, especially from the group of people that pioneered “purity rings” and abstinence-only sex education. The article goes on to help explain why this stat might be so overwhelming, including the fact that it’s socially acceptable (if not expected) to have pre-marital sex in the 2000s, but also that in Biblical times, it was far easier to retain your virginity till marriage considering you’d barely be reaching puberty when you were married off to another young teen:

Sociologically speaking, the one big difference –- and it’s monstrous –- between the biblical teaching and our culture is the arranged marriages of very young people. If you get married when you’re 13, you don’t have 15 years of temptation.

So there you have it. Even the Bible thumpers are gettin’ down before they tie the knot. We win. The end.