There is NOTHING America likes more than charming stories of people falling in love despite unfortunate circumstances. There are entire shows dedicated to the cheesiness that is unplanned love. America also loves disfigured animals. That dog that could walk on two legs? Adorable! Cats with one eye? Awwwww. Elephants with no trunk? That doesn’t exist, but picture it in your head. It would probably be SO CUTE.

So this story, of course, made every single American woman squeal in delight: It surrounds a little British girl named Maddison Biddlecombe  (ARE YOU KIDDING ME?) and her pony. This pony, named Diego, is not just any pony. He’s a hilariously disfigured pony that looks like it was painted by a 4 year old. It’s got a mouth that rivals Franck Ribery’s, a tongue that permanently sticks out, and a skull that looks like it was squeezed out of a soft serve machine.

Observe:

The poor little guy needs an expensive surgery to fix his face, but considering her story is plastered all over the internet, I can safely assume that by the end of the work week she’ll have a healthy, normal looking pony, and most likely she and Diego will be hosting the first episode of next season’s SNL. See you then, adorably repulsive horse!