Sometimes I think the 1930s were a better time. I mean, sure they didn’t have iPhones or free downloadable porn and the Great Depression was in full effect, but hey, the cars were badass and the dancing was… okay fine the cars were badass. And when a piece of literature this fine comes around, you […]
I always assumed that someday in the future, people would look at our iPod touches and laugh, thinking, HA! What primitive music wear! To think, they didn’t have microchips embedded in their occipital lobes through which all the music in the world could be streamed at any moment of the day. Instead, it turns out […]
There are few things on the internet that give us as much pre-teen giddiness as a flirty Facebook chat. If you’re like me, you’re generally repulsed everytime you hear the little *clink* of a Facebook chat message, because 99.9% of the time it’s the LAST person you want to talk to (i.e. the most boring […]
As our miserable gloomy July finally recedes and the beautiful summer we expected all along arrives, you’ll notice many similarities between folks out and about. Less clothing, bigger smiles, most likely, an icy cold beer in hand. After the recent Fourth of July Weekend, it’s become apparent that people are going to enjoy the majority […]
I write this post with a heavy heart, as currently San Diego looks less like our beautiful, sunny city and more like Seattle or Ireland or some terrible frigid place where water falls from the sky in the middle of July. How is it that the rest of the world is experiencing record-breaking heat, we’re […]
You know how sometimes you have those moments when a little voice in your head that tells you to do weird, creepy stuff? Like open your neighbors mail or look in someone’s window? But you don’t do it because that would be really creepy and would probably get you arrested? Sometimes, when you’ve been broken […]
You guys. YOU GUYS. This is really important. Shut up. We have to change allegiances. I love the US of A (re: previous post) but right now, we all need to take one for the team and start cheering for Paraguay. I don’t care where your loyalties actually lie (better be America, patriot), we have […]
If my Googling is correct (I don’t do math), Sunday marks the 234th Independence Day of our nation. We broke free from the shackles of unfair taxation and fancy-pants accents and said, NO THANK YOU to the letter U getting all up in certain words. That was 1776, a time of wooden teeth and pooping […]
It’s been a while since our last post regarding the openly douchey dating site BeautifulPeople.com. If you recall, they were slammed by critics everywhere (including yours truly) for expelling some 5,000 members for putting on weight after the holidays. Which is SUPER douchey. Apparently, Founder Robert Hintze said, “Letting fatties roam the site is a […]
Back in my day, we used to use a combination of diet and exercise to lose weight. You whippersnappers will never know the misery of cutting down your calorie intake, eating lots of fruits and vegetables, and working out for an hour… YES, AN HOUR! three to four times a week to improve health and […]
