You Look Like Sh*t
“The most over-used line in cinema” or not, I will be yelling this at everyone I pass today. Happy Monday, everyone, you look like sh*t!
Videos
Man Forced To Eat His Own Beard… in an Argument… OVER A TRACTOR.
There are several amazing, incredible, awesome, wonderful things about this Friday. For one — it’s Friday. IT’S FRIDAY! For two, this guy in Kentucky tried to unreasonably inflate the price of this riding mower to his friend so his friend cut off his beard and forced him to eat it. THANKS, MSNBC, FOR MAKING […]
Shadow Puppet Porn
Rule #34 states that “if it exists, there is porn of it.” Which, as I’ve learned in my time as a professor at BootyCallU, is 100%, positively true. Everything from Simpsons characters to robots to ET characters (do NOT Google ET porn, for the sake of your childhood), and now the always innocent shadow puppets. […]
Keenan Cahill Ft. 50 Cent
As you may or may not know, I have a long standing crush on Keenan Cahill, AKA BeenerKeeKee19952 on YouTube. Something about that pubescent skin and oddly huge head shape and Stone Henge teeth and Billy Crystal hair just stole my heart and did an awkward dance with it. However, I was of course, in […]
Great Middle School Trick Play
This little guy might only be in 7th grade, but he should consider majoring in The Art Of Walking Nonchalantly to the Endzone, LIKE A BOSS. Awesome work, little dude!
Walrus Masturbates
In response to the many ads and billboards and witch-senate-candidates around the country currently protesting masturbation, I give you this hilarious video of a walrus furiously yanking it at an aquarium. This is proof that all animals have to occasionally service themselves. You’ll notice that this is video is titled “Walrus Masturbation 5,” and in […]
.50 Caliber William Tell
It was recently learned that certain human beings are actually genetically predisposed to seek thrill. Research has shown that their brain’s propensity for the effects of dopamine is much higher, which is why they enjoy bungee jumping and sky-diving and swimming with murderous-dinosaur-dragons sharks more than the rest of us. Usually, I envy them. I […]
Creepy Anti-Porn PSA
I recently watched an hour long documentary about the porn business, and how professional porn stars are losing money and their jobs because of the proliferation of amateur sex sites and free pornography on the internet (interesting note: it’s hard to feel bad for someone when you’ve seen a whole soda bottle come out of […]
Best Fan Celebration of All Time
Some might say, “this is old,” and others might say, “damn, what is this kid on?” but I say, “you sir, are absolutely the coolest, most confident, steeliest-of-balls guy I have ever had the pleasure of watching on YouTube (sorry, Keenan)”. Check out the video below for a very happy Celtics fan and the spectators […]
Iguana Farting in a Bathtub
Why? Because why not. Because we all now know that we’re living in a time of unimaginable crises and 2010 is pretty much the new 2012 and sometimes something ridiculous needs to happen so we can all be reminded that in all reality, we are a bunch of mistakes walking around a giant round mistake […]