We’ve always championed the idea that #MarriageCanWait – and now we have some real, solid information, via BuzzFeed, on important things to consider before you make it legal/put a ring on it/say yes to the dress/etc.

Via BuzzFeed:

I recently asked the divorce lawyers of the BuzzFeed Community to share their advice for engaged couples (or anyone who has plans to marry one day).

Here is what they had to say:

Don’t marry someone you wouldn’t want to divorce. “I’ve seen so many couples become incredibly petty and decimate negotiations because they view the divorce as a settling of the score or a win/lose situation. This is especially bad when custody is involved.”

Sexting is cheating. And they will use the photos as evidence! Think about that the next time you send a dick pic to your mistress.

Don’t pull the divorce card in every argument that you might have with your partner. Seriously, I can’t stress this enough but if every time you fight one of you threatens to divorce, maybe you shouldn’t even be married in the first place.

Don’t be afraid to ask tough questions before committing yourself to someone for the rest of your life. It may be hard to have these conversations, but the short-term hurt is better than suffering through a bad relationship and having your partner do the same.

Having wildly different money habits/ideologies are at the root of so many of the divorces I handle… It can cause so much resentment and conflict. 

Don’t rush into marriage and address your issues before getting married. How are you going to deal with money? How are you going to raise kids? What are your life goals? Love is great, but it can’t sustain a long marriage if you aren’t on the same page about how you’re going to lead the rest of your life.