Well, someone hasn’t been reading BCU. According to Twitter account (which, to be honest, I don’t believe his fragile fingers manage), the Playboy founder and eternal bachelor has decided to tie the knot with his 23 year old girlfriend Crystal Harris.

Despite his past statements like “monogamy is something that was invented along the way to take care of children,” the 84 year old mogul seems to have finally changed his mind. He tweeted,”I gave Crystal a ring. This is the happiest Christmas in memory,” which I assume is a reference to his decaying memory senses.

Sigh. Another one bites the dust.