Summer has arrived on the scene in San Diego (thank god, finally, WTF nature thanks for being punctual) and we’re remembering how awesome it can really be. At the same time, it gives us an excuse to enjoy work because at least we’re inside out of the blazing hot miserable death sun for a few hours of the day, surfing the internet,  trying to figure out ways to make 90 degree weather bearable. Here are a few of our top picks for summer purchases.

1) The Holmes 7 Twin Window Fan

Hey, we’re in a recession, people. If you’re one of the lucky people who actually has air conditioning in their apartment, you probably turn it on for like, 15 minutes, and then start getting so anxious that you can actually see the dollar signs spilling from the vents, like in one of those hilarious infomercials, except in this hilarious infomercial you can’t afford your mortgage anymore.

2) It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia Season 5 DVD

Less than a month till season 6 premieres, which means you need to either recap last season OR, if you’ve never seen the show, first staple your fingertips together because you deserve punishment, and then watch season 5 so you at least have some idea of what is going on, you uncultured bastard.

3) A waterproof digital camera

Digital schmigital. No one cares about how high def your pictures are or how much memory your card has. The only thing that matters is can you drop your camera in your Jack and Coke and still take awesome pictures? And with a waterproof cam, like the Pentax one pictured below, you can get your camera just as drunk as you, jump in the pool with it, and still upload that shot of you peeing on an electric fence to Facebook. Assuming you’re still alive.4) A volleyball net

Some of my favorite summer memories have been made with friends at the beach, playing volleyball all day until you are so sunburned and drunk off Faderade (2 parts red Gatorade, one part vodka, or vice versa)  that you don’t know the score and someone is passed out in their own urine. Note: spend the extra dollars on a good net set-up. There is nothing more frustrating than having a buzz and wrestling with a crappy $20 volleyball net. Trust me.

5) Either THIS or THIS, I can’t decide because they are both so awesome oh my GOD.

SkyMall magazine was great as a kid because you could look at it and be like, MOM MOM MOM I WANT THIS, and she’d be like, yeah sure we’ll talk about it when we get home, and then you’d forget about it because SkyMall only exists in the sky. Now, though, there is a website, and I have a credit card, and the chances of me buying that mermaid tail thing are really really unfortunately high. The world’s thickest noodle, though? Well. That’s just hilarious.

Hhahahaha. World’s thickest noodle.