And in one long, boring-until-the-last-second match on Sunday, the World Cup is over. Congrats to Spain! No more drunken 7 am cheering, no vuvuzelas destroying my ears every morning, and no more underwater creatures make predictions (?) of how sports events are going to play out. Needless to say, men of the world are feeling bored, and post-month-long-bender hungover. You may be feeling lost, confused, and unaware of how to start your life after such an important event left you. Well, slow down captain, we got you covered. BCU has your top 5 list of things to do now that the World Cup is over.

1) Sober up

Take a week to get off the bottle. Not unlike a heroine binge in someone’s garage, you’re probably feeling anxious, sick, and in a LOT of pain. So get a few 18 packs (OF WATER) and continually drink them, all day, every day, until your body is rid of the toxins that you’ve been pouring into it for the past month and a half.Oh, and if you’re feeling really adventurous, considering eating some fruits and vegetables. They’ll help your body replenish the nutrients it loses when you eat bar food for 6 weeks.

2) Go outside

If you live in San Diego, you got lucky this past month because it was cloudy and disgusting and cold, so being in a dark, dingy pub wasn’t all that big of a deal. But just now, as though the gods predicted it, the sun has come out to greet the world and entice you to actually step foot outside. And assuming you are sobering up, you’ll need the Vitamin D to combat the soul-crushing depression.

3) Watch baseball

I know, I know, compared to the non-stop “action” of soccer, baseball is boring and full of fatties. However, if you’re a true sports fan, you’re gonna need something to get you by until Spetember when football finally starts. Think of baseball as the methadone to your soccer addiction.

4) Go to the movies

Did you know that during the past month, while you were tearing up in the corner because all 6 of your favorite teams lost, there were some awesome movies coming out? Toy Story 3, Despicable Me, and the underrated Cyrus are all still in theaters and still making people laugh, cry, and think. Go hit a movie theater with some popcorn and a 40 oz beverage (OF SODA) and get back into the American lifestyle. And on that note,

5) Start being American again

You’ve probably been eating gross Euro foods and drinking Euro beer for a while now, and you may have forgotten what it’s like to be a die-hard American patriot. So put your scarf and Adidas away, head down to McDonald’s, order a combo, and then eat it while holding your gun and wearing your American flag and talking about how soccer is Socialist.

Don’t worry, buddy, your life will be better soon. As soon as football starts, you’ll forget why you even cared about that stupid game, until 2014 when you’ll become the most die-hard “footy” fan ever to touch the Earth.