I always enjoy reminders that I am soul-crushingly poor, so I popped on over to Reuters and learned that the Emirates Palace, a hotel Abu Dhabi, the capital of the UAE, recently installed an ATM that dispenses gold.

Maybe I need to rephrase that for you.

There is a machine, in Abu Dhabi, into which you put money in exchange for SOLID GOLD BARS.

Soon, the hotel says, they will also dispense coins with the hotel name on it, which would make “a nice souvenir for guests to take home.” What a swell idea! And to think, it only costs $1,236 an ounce! So affordable, assuming you are a Saudi oil baron or a Colombian cocaine warlord or owner of the universe or Mark Zuckerberg!

Read more at Reuters, if you want to feel terrible about your life.