Technology has its perks, free communication, quick responses, and microwavable cake come to mind. However, it’s not crazy to believe that technology has made us a little apprehensive and shy about talking face to face. People have a hard time even asking each other on dates, let alone talking about sex. The only thing that could possibly be worse than talking about sex is talking about bad sex, when you’re just not enjoying it, or your partner is flat out failing at satisfying you. Don’t worry, BCU has got you covered. Here are some tips about telling your partner they need some help in bed.

1) Be positive

Instead of saying, “I don’t like when you do…” it’ll be less confrontational if you say, “That was great, you know what you should try?” Trust us when we say, women and men are both  a bit sensitive  about their skills in the sack. Telling a guy or a girl that they screw like a epileptic leech isn’t going to get them to change, it’s gonna make them walk out the front door, forever.

2) Be casual

Sitting your partner down at the kitchen table and saying, “look, we have to talk.” Is going to make the conversation so awkward, you’ll be able to cut the tension with a pair of kid-scissors. On that same note, don’t off-handedly mention their ineptitude in the bedroom while having picking up groceries. Keep the sex talk in bed, or if you’re still nervous, drop a text with something you’d like them to try. It’ll come off less as a lecture and more as a provocative text.

3) Be assertive

Let’s say you dropped them a text mentioning something you wanted in bed, and as horny as they were when you two finally met up, they completely forgot what you asked for an d went on with their usual Dalmation-like ferocity. This is where you stop them and remind them (politely of course) that you asked for something specifically. The longer you let them carry on not pleasing you in bed, the more they’ll assume you just love their style.

4) Say thank you

If they finally manage to get something right, treat them like a puppy that went potty outside for the first time. Praise, praise, praise! Show them you appreciate it by making more noise than usual and afterwards, exclaim their godliness to the heavens. Even if it was just slightly better than average, you want to keep them working to get better and better, so do like your mother told you, and say thank you!