Revenge Sex vs Rebound Sex
We’ve all been in the post-breakup funk before. It’s like a mix of confusion and self-pity and heart-brokenness and a shock that the world has not just straight-up STOPPED SPINNING, because how could people possibly be going on living when something so horrible has happened?!?!
Okay… maybe it’s not really that bad, but it is a shitty feeling, that’s for sure. Sometimes we drown our sadness in booze or ice cream, and sometimes we just blast sad music and rock back and forth in the shower doing our best Dawson impression. However, we all know that the best way to get over a bad breakup is to get back up on the horse, and by horse we mean STRANGE BOOTY.
According to a new study of 170 college students who had suffered a recent breakup, one-third admitted to having rebound sex, and another 25% claimed they’d had “revenge” sex.
Via NY Daily News:
“Consistent with popular beliefs about rebound and revenge sex, having sex to cope with distress and to get over or get back at the ex-partner were elevated immediately following the breakup and then declined over time, as did the probability of having sex with a new partner,” the study reads.
Researchers also confirmed another thing you probably know — that the people who were dumped felt angry and distressed, and were more likely to seek out rebound sex than those who did the dumping.
Our question is this: What’s the difference between rebound sex and revenge sex?
We think it has a little to do with intent.
If you’re having sex because hooking up makes you feel good (sexy, independent, in charge), then that’s REBOUND sex: you’re getting out of a funk and showing yourself that you don’t NEED a relationship to be satisfied and happy!
On the other hand, if you’re hooking up with a stranger because you want your ex to find out, specifically to hurt them, then that’s revenge sex, and should be avoided! Maybe it’ll feel good at first, but by trying to hurt your ex on purpose, all you’re doing is saying “you still have a hold on my emotions,” which means THEY win!
So – moral of the story? If you’re gonna engage in some post-breakup booty callin’, make it on your own terms, for your own happiness, to help yourself move on from the ex – not to try and hurt them. For your own good!
Have you ever had revenge or rebound sex? How did it go?
February 15, 2014 @ 8:09 am
Revenge sex is the best.
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Anthony
January 30, 2014 @ 6:10 pm
Wow. I seem to have forgotten that emoticons only show up as “?” On this website. Dammit. lol Oh, well..
January 30, 2014 @ 6:09 pm
I must admit that this article has impressed me. I find it to be the most mentally and emotionally fulfilling articles I’ve read Online in a while. Especially here at Booty Call University. Most of your articles are fun and entertaining, but this one serves a much deeper purpose and it does it very well. Bravo, BCU! Bravo! ???
Now, to answer the question at the latter part of the article. Yes. I have engaged in Rebound Sex before. I find there’s nothing wrong with it as long as no one’s feelings are being manipulated, either by mistake or on purpose. Revenge Sex isn’t my thing for the very reasons stated in the article. It’s childish and an admittance that the other party has the upper hand. I HAVE fallen victim to similar scenarios before. I once met a woman Online at a social networking website that was very much obsessed with her -ex when she met me. She told me that she met him on that same website and that his profile seems to have disappeared or been closed. Not seeing the ‘Big Picture’, I gave her advice that she used to track him down successfully, continuing her stalking of that guy and dropping our budding ‘friendship’ like a bad habit. I learned my lesson and it also made me even less trusting than I’ve already been made to be by precious experiences with Online women. Well.. I’m getting off the Psychotherapist’s sofa, now.?