We’ve talked before, MANY TIMES, about the thrill and sexiness of a little public nookie. Sometimes, it’s a good idea, and sometimes, it’s a very bad idea in the very worst possible way. However, in all cases we imagine the main two reasons people love public sex is because A) they’re horny and don’t want to wait, and B) the scandalous idea of getting caught is a turn on.

However, I think people should start taking into account WHO might catch them in the act. Like for example, a random passerby adult might be fine, but a young child? Not okay. Or a F***ING LION? Also not a good idea.

And in our minds, another crowd you’d probably not want to be walked in on by would be the clientele at an English McDonald’s. According to Metro.co.uk, though, that didn’t stop one couple from going at it ON THE FLOOR OF THE MCDONALD’S BATHROOM:

Shocked customers complained after hearing clearly audible ‘grunting and groaning’ coming from the toilets.

One witness, a 42-year-old woman who wanted to remain anonymous, said the pair should be ‘disgusted with themselves’.

‘They looked maybe late-30s, not even young – old enough to know better anyway,’ she said.

‘People who had gone in started coming back from the toilet with a horrified look on their faces. My daughter then went herself. She told me that they were at it on the floor.’

Ew. Ew ew ew ew. As a person who spent most of their high school years in a local McDonalds dipping french fries in a McFlurry (mmmm. It’s lunch time and I’m hungry), I know what the bathrooms (and specifically the bathroom floors) look like. The thought of putting bare skin on the tile of a fast food restaurant, where people who have been eating THESE all day? NO THANK YOU. No, no no no thank you.

Remember, we’re NOT OPPOSED to public sex. What we’re opposed to is the idea of getting down and dirty in the DIRTIEST PLACE ON THE PLANET.

(psst – in case you’re feeling like gettin’ down outside the bedroom and wanna do it right, use our tips here!)