Now here’s a REAL bummer… despite never marrying throughout their 14 year relationship, reports say that Johnny Depp, star of dozens of hit movies including the recent The Rum Diary, will pay out a whopping $156 million to his soon-to-be-ex, French actress Vanessa Paradis, in order to “keep the split amicable.”

According to the Mail Online, the couple, who up until Tuesday denied their split altogether, have finally released a statement saying, ‘Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis have amicably separated. Please respect their privacy and, more importantly, the privacy of their children.’ Reasons behind the split are as of yet unknown, although possibilities range from career obligations keeping them apart, to a much more interesting rumor that Depp has fallen for his gorgeous Rum Diary co-star Amber Heard… yep, the bi-sexual one!

Let me tell you – we’re pretty miffed. One of the main reasons we’ve always brushed off marriage as a pointless, out-dated societal norm, was because of the ridiculous alimony payments! And here comes Johnny, STILL PAYING even though he was never married? COLOR ME CONFUSED.

Last reports say that Amber Heard was seen boarding Depp’s private jet to Las Vegas… so the steamy controversy continues. We’ll keep you updated!