What is a “yikes” costume, you ask? Simple: it’s anything that will make someone cringe, or look away, or vomit, or slap you. A yikes costume denounces political correctness and says NAY to the normal, acceptable levels of offensiveness. There will be no cat ears on a yikes costumer, no packaged latex mask. There MIGHT be vomit.

1. Big Bad Wolf

Using a pretend severed head from a Halloween store and a pair of pants a couple sizes too big, scare your friends and strangers by whipping this awkward head out your zipper when you enter the room. Confused? See THIS POST.

2. Muammar Gaddhafi

It would be easy to dress as the recently captured and killed dictator without raising too many eyebrows, but the key here to gaining a leg up on authenticity is to glue the handle of a knife to the butt of your pants. Recently released footage shows that someone actually sodomized the injured Gaddhafi with a blade as he was pulled from his bunker. Adding that tiny detail will make all the difference in making your costume YIKESable.

3. Doug Hutchison and his child bride Courtney Stodden

Channeling this horrific series of photos, dress in a red shirt, awkward pants, head bandana, and out-of-date sunglasses. With you, carry a blonde headed baby doll dressed in a tiny bikini. Slather that baby’s face in lipstick, eyeshadow, and drawn on abs.

4. Casey Anthony Lover

This requires two costumes: one, of a creepy, van-driving rapist, and two, of a Casey Anthony supporter. Take, for example, a creepy mustache, hair slicked back, and brown cardigan under which you have a t-shirt that says “Marry Me Casey!” and a pin that says “Team Casey!”

5. Zombie Steve Jobs – (ugh, even I feel bad writing this)

Snug black turtle neck, tucked into jeans complimented by zombie makeup. For the full effect, use an iPad shirt and have a cross section of a destroyed pancreas on the screen as the Pandora app plays scary Halloween music.