THIS IS NOT A JOKE. I REPEAT. THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

A family of four in Danvers, Massachusetts apparently do NOT have the best sense of direction, as they actually got lost, like, for reals lost, in a corn maze at a place called Connors Farm. And of course, because an embarrassing news story wouldn’t be complete without a MORTIFYING 911 call, a local news team released the family’s terrified call for help and then put it on YouTube.

I bet that dad was stoked to go back to work and chat with the boys on Monday. No one is known to be more empathetic and kind to those in embarrassing situations like middle-aged Bostonian dudes.