If you walked by a building with a sign calling itself “the naughtiest show in Des Moines,” what would you expect to see inside? A basketful of kittens mewing quietly? An elderly blind man playing violin by himself? A children’s choir singing Christmas carols? No, you’d probably expect to see some NUDEZ, or at least TITTAYS, right?

Well, not in Iowa, apparently. According to the Smoking Gun, two burlesque dancers in Iowa were fined for (prepare yourself) showing their boobs. Not going down on a customer, not popping ping pong balls out of their pooters, SHOWING THEIR BREASTS.

From the source:

Inside the club, Sergeant Chris Hardy and Officer Robert Hoelscher established an observation post from which they spotted the full breasts of Erin O’Grady and Julia Mahlstadt. As Hoelscher noted in his report, “Both Incidents were recorded and then observed by both Sgt. Hardy and I.”

While O’Grady was being issued a citation, “she stated that her breast did come out, but it was an accident.”

Boy oh boy, Chris and Bobby sure sound like a blast, huh? Definitely like someone you’d want to invite to your bachelor party or over for a BBQ. I can just picture them totally letting loose: “Errmmm, excuuuse me, but you know you can’t have that propane tank this close to the neighboring yard, riiiiight? I’m gonna have to shut this party down. EVERYONE GO HOME… but not before I confiscate these delicious bratwursts.”

Iowa: making everything boring since 1835.