The headline for this story was too long and complicated to attempt to squeeze into the subject box of this blog, so let me explain why this is the worst murder story ever:

According to the Daily Mail, “James Kraig Kahler murdered his entire family when his request for a threesome led his wife to a lesbian affair.” WOOF, right? That’s a rough one.

Kahler, of Topeka, KS introduced his wife Karen to a woman named Sunny Reese with the intention of inviting her into a threesome. Karen refused, but within months of the introduction, she and Reese began an open affair, eventually leading Karen to pursue a divorce from James. Talk about your worse nightmare as a man, huh?

According to the testimony, when James lost his job he began a spiral into insanity – obsessed with his estranged wife’s new relationship with the woman he only planned to have a threesome with once – and it all came to a peak when he took an automatic weapon and shot his wife, two teenage daughters, and grandmother a week after Thanksgiving in 2009. His 12-year-old son was apparently at the scene too, but was able to flee uninjured.

This is one of the saddest, most unnerving news stories I’ve read in some time, so why did I bring it to the otherwise pleasant BootyCallU? Because, students – here’s reason #9,880 not to get married: THIS ENTIRE STORY. Whether you’re male or female, this story tells a horrific story of what marriage can do to a couple. Stay single and have threesomes galore without turning into a crazed lunatic or getting murdered.

I give this story an A for Actually Scaring Me Under the Covers.