As I shared with you last week, I occasionally cocktail waitress at a bar near the San Diego convention center and thusly, enjoyed some phenomenal people-watching throughout the Comic-Con weekend. What I failed to consider, though, was that several of the sweet, albeit awkward men I was filling numerous Diet Cokes for were probably hunting the night scene for some nerd-worthy poon-tang.

Luckily, the bloggers over at Ranker picked up where I left off, and found 10 of the greatest Craigslist posts from the weekend’s convention attendees, and boy are they… um… interesting?

I’ve shared my top 3 favorites below. Oh, and just as a warning – put the sandwich down now before you puke a little in your mouth.

This is a good one because of his confidence – “I KNOW there are PLENTY of you,” is hilarious, because yes – there are many women in town that are dressed in cosplay costumes for the weekend, but 90% of them are hired by game companies and wouldn’t touch a convention attendee with a ten foot pole.

This one is great because if you nix the sexual terms, it could easily just be some dude inviting some guys over for a LAN party. It’s also funny because I wonder how many guys opened this ad and were like “yes! That’s EXACTLY how I wanted to spend my weekend! How DID he know?!”

Anyone who watches crime documentaries on National Geographic knows that this post is just riddled with code words – crash… slave…  key…  hang…  business…  douche… There is ABSOLUTELY something suspicious going on. Oh, and other than the heading, he doesn’t specify a female companion even once. I smell a Comic-Con snuff film in the making. Creepy.

Check out the rest of the hilarious (and somewhat disconcerting) Comic-Con Craigslist ads over at Ranker. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.